These are the Best Sex Positions If You Have Incontinence

Medically reviewed by Amanda Savage, edited 20/07/2023

A pelvic floor problem, such as incontinence or bladder weakness, can stop you from embracing your sexuality and can cause a heavy strain on intimate relationships. 

Choosing Sexual Positions to Suit Your Body

Conditions that affect the bladder functions, its nerves, and the involvement of pelvic floor muscles can cause discomfort in some sexual positions.Pain, spasms, bladder weakness and a pelvic floor that is not very co-ordinated can affect sexual function.Kegel8© can help you find the best position to maximise pleasure.

Try the following positions for more comfortable intercourse:

Modified Missionary
A pillow underneath to tilt your pelvis will move pelvic organs back out of the way, supports your spine, helps you relax and helps make your partner feel less heavy.

There is no weight on your spine, pelvis or rubbing on the vulva skin. You do not need to be too active. You can control the speed and depth of penetration.  However, there may be pressure against the base of the bladder which could be irritating.

Place several pillows between your partners thighs to help manage the depth of penetrations. You may need to lean far forward to help with penetration.  This position keeps your partner’s weight away from your hips and pelvis. There is less rubbing on the posterior wall of the vagina.

There is no pressure on your belly but might push into the bladder more.

Being a little more adventurous about how & where you have sex may increase your libido.  The shower is a good option if you worry about leaks.

Vaginal Dryness and Atrophy

Around 17% of women aged 18-50 experience problems with vaginal dryness during sex, even before menopause. This can cause some pain and discomfort during almost any position in sexual intercourse and may even take a toll on your relationship.

With all the hormonal changes women experience, from pregnancy and breastfeeding, through the changes associated with the perimenopause to general ageing, you may find that your body no longer makes enough natural lubricating secretions for the vagina opening and the vaginal tube.  Sex without enough lubrication in this area can distort and drag creating a friction burn, pain and discomfort. The quality of personal lubricants is key and it is 
important to ensure that they are pH balanced to the normal vaginal pH of between 3.8pH and 4.5pH. Lubricants with a higher pH are too alkaline and can lead to UTIs, Thrush and Bacterial Vaginosis. Spending more time on foreplay and using lubricants, oestrogen gels and pessaries are amongst the most popular forms of treatments for vaginal dryness.

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How Can You Improve Your Sex Life?

There are 101 ways by which you can increase the excitement in the bedroom, ranging from natural solutions to electronic treatments. Kegel8 have compiled a list of our top picks for improving your sex life when suffering from pelvic problems:

  • Kegel! – As we age we often think it’s inevitable that our vagina will lose all its suppleness that it once had in youth and impact on our sexual lives. But this is a myth! There are things that you can do to improve the situation. Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles is a guaranteed way to reinvigorate your sex life; a stronger pelvic floor can increase the sensation for both you and your partner. You also need to practise relaxing your muscles to allow comfortable stretch and movement inside.  Use Kegel8’s Ultra 20 Electronic Pelvic Toner to effectively amplify your sex life today!
  • Lube up – Using an organic, water-based lubricant sometimes becomes essential as we grow older. But don’t feel like you have lost a part of your allure if you need to buy some; if anything, you’re preserving your sexual life. Try a lubricant such as the Kegel8 KE Gel that is hormone free and body friendly.
  • Talk it out – Communication is key when it comes to satisfying sex. Let your partner know which positions aren’t working for you, and which positions really get you going.

Download our E-Book: Intimacy for more advice and information.

If the suggestions in this book do not help you or seem to apply to you, it is important to book to see your GP for a proper examination, discussion of the issues and full investigation into your personal situation.

If you are not having sex or avoiding intimacy because there is a deeper problem with your or your partner’s libido, or physically something is stopping you even trying (this could be a physical block, an injury, scarring, pain in the vaginal or anus, an infection or bleeding) this should not be ignored.  If you want to have sex but feel you can’t then NOW is the time to take action.  

Reviews for the Kegel8 Ultra 20 Electronic Pelvic Toner

Pauline - So Far, So Good!

"I’m 6 weeks into the 3 month course and the results are fab. Everything feels tighter and my stress incontinence is noticeably improved. I’ve had 4 babies, one causing a third degree tear, so I’ve been using super strength Tena Lady but I’m now using super thin ones.

Here’s to using none at all after the next 6 weeks :) Thank you Kegel!

Amanda - Don't Delay, Just Buy It!

"I have been using my Kegel8 for just over 12 weeks. I can honestly say that my issue embarrassing to talk about which was that I was starting to leak. Just started without any warning signs. I can say that I just wanted to shut myself away. Suddenly all I saw on TV we're adverts with smiling women wearing pads and big knickers. Definitely not for me. Nothing to smile about why do they always look so happy? . I bought my Kegel8 and honestly within weeks my symptoms started to disappear.

12 weeks and all back to normal. It means just putting your feet up for 1 hour day, once you get in the rhythm of doing it it's just like brushing your teeth. I would recommend this product to anyone. I would also strongly suggest calling customer services, tell them your issue and they will make sure you are using the right programs. They are friendly and helpful. Lastly there are other benefits; life in the bedroom is so much better. Another big bonus. It's a one off expense but well worth it. So buy one.


[1] Jha, S., Strelley, K., & Radley, S. (2012, January 12). Incontinence during intercourse: Myths unraveled [Abstract]. International Urogynecology Journal, 23(5), pp. 633-637.

[2] NAFC (2018) The Best Sex Positions If You Have Incontinence or Pelvic Organ Prolapse [online]. National Association for Continence [viewed 20/09/2018]. Available from